Life Saver

DEAR DIARY - DAY 1

All packed for the cruise ship -- all my nicest dresses, swimsuits,

short sets. Really, really exciting. Our local Red Hat chapter

decided on this "all-girls" trip.

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DEAR DIARY - DAY 2

Entire day at sea, beautiful. Saw whales and dolphins. Met the

Captain today -- seems like a very nice man.

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DEAR DIARY - DAY 3

At the pool today. Did some shuffleboard, hit golf balls off the

deck. Captain invited me to join him at his table for dinner. Felt

honored and had a wonderful time. He is very attractive and attentive.

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DEAR DIARY - DAY 4

Won $800 in the ship's casino. Captain asked me to have dinner with

him in his own cabin. Had a scrumptious meal complete with caviar and

champagne. He asked me to stay the night, but I declined. Told him I

could not be unfaithful to my husband.

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DEAR DIARY - DAY 5

Pool again today. Got sunburned, and I went inside to drink at

piano-bar, stayed there for rest of day. Captain saw me, bought me

several large drinks.

Really is charming. Again asked me to visit his cabin for the night.

Again I declined. He told me, if I did not let him have his way with

me, he would sink the ship.. I was shocked..

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DEAR DIARY - DAY 6

Today I saved 1600 lives.

Twice